My method to overcome fear, shame, and guilt.
My job as an energy healer seems weird to many. I don't blame people for thinking this way. I remember my thoughts when a bank teller told me not to take out a home loan because of Mercury Retrograde. I didn't know what it was. I thought it sounds kooky. It turned me off.
Energy healing, and those that practice it, often use many abstract words that scare people away. Whether it is moon recharging or pranic flow or some word in Sanskrit or Chinese, it intimidates people. We (the collective we) can stand to use more straightforward, less mythical language.
I think science, perceived reality, and common sense can all agree that your life is energy. You feel emotions, and every emotion has energy. When you are happy or in love, you have high energy (also known as vibration).
Not only can you feel your own energy, but you can also feel the energy of other people. You can feel their insecurities, their anger, or their glow. And people can feel yours.
The lowest energies
I'm sure you can associate with these energies as being your lowest vibration. You feel like hiding, doing nothing, and being alone. These lowest energies are:
The highest vibrations come from love, and seeing everything and everyone as one, with no separation. It is impossible to feel love and wholeness if you are feeling afraid, ashamed, or unworthy.
When an energy healer or someone else talks about clearing your chakras, or cleansing your auras, they are talking about getting past these low energies and allowing energy to flow to your greatest good.
Let's talk about getting past these low energies of fear, shame, and guilt.
You have nothing to fear, but...
The Roosevelts knew a few things about fear. Not only did they face a devastated economy and an unprecedented attack on our country, but they had their internal struggles as well. Without a doubt, becoming President of the United States while being paralyzed from the waist down took guts. His experiences and inner fire caused us to believe him wholeheartedly when he said there wasn't anything to fear but fear itself.
Don't dare overlook his wife. She's the one that guides me to get past my fears. Look at this quote:
"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along. 'You must do the thing you think you cannot do." - Eleanor Roosevelt.
Here's how you overcome fear:
Face one fear daily.
I'm not talking about jumping from an airplane or sticking your head in a lion's mouth. I'm talking about making small, actionable pursuits of fear daily. Here are some examples:
Tell someone that you love them.
Ask your boss for a raise.
Share your art or writing with a stranger.
Join a Meetup group.
Even these may sound insurmountable. If so, start with other fears, such as telling yourself that you love yourself. Or, look someone in the eyes and tell them good morning.
If you face fear daily, fear will begin to disappear.
What are you ashamed of?
If you've been reading my writings, you know that I love paradoxes. The paradox about fear is that when you face it, it goes away. For shame, it would seem like it separates us from other people. It feels like no one would accept us because of what we are ashamed of.
The paradox is authenticity. That's what connects us. We are most connected to other people when we share the truth of ourselves. Sharing the truth means not hiding any piece of who we are.
Howard Stern tells millions of listeners that he has a small penis. Lizzo wears bodysuits and twerks her way to Grammys. Look around. The more you look, the more you'll see famous and successful people loaded with imperfections. We love people with bad hairdos, stained clothes, and messed up teeth. Why? Because they love themselves, and more importantly, they love to share themselves with other people.
Here are a few personal examples:
Bringing store-bought cookies to a school fundraiser.
Wearing crocs with dress pants to go to the grocery.
Joining a work video call with wild bed-head.
Publishing my first article on Medium.
Was it scary? Hell yeah! See the part about fear above. But here's the key: have compassion for yourself.
It's okay not to be okay.
Guilt and regret are the partners of many ruined lives. What is a ruined life? It is a life that never saw its potential. It stopped trying.
A large majority of people seeking energy healing are those stuck in the past.
What if I told you the past wasn't real?
What would you do differently today if you had no past? What if I convinced you that the past was an illusion? I mean, memories can be rewritten, right? I know I wouldn't recall certain parts of my childhood if it weren't for my parents' stories and seeing pictures.
Is your past programmed? Can it change?
Think about it:
Can you change your past?
Or, can you at least remember it differently?
Or, what would happen if you focused more on the future?
I'm a proponent of mindfulness and living in the moment. However, if I had to choose for someone to either focus on the past or focus on the future, I choose to focus on the future. This idea doesn't mean focusing on the what-ifs of the future, but instead projecting a positive and vibration future full of possibility.
"But I don't believe in manifesting my future. It doesn't work." Do you know what doesn't work? Staying focused on the faults of your past.
Instead of living the blame game, why not fuel the fire of possibility?
To get past the energy-lowering elements of fear, shame, and guilt, do the following:
Face a fear daily.
Have compassion for yourself.
Look to the future.
The more you do these things, the more energy you'll feel, and the more love and connectedness you will see.